A rainy winter night in Wichita,Kansas

December 14, 1971 found me in the midst of holiday planning, tree decorating and cookie making.

Big plans for later that day reinforced my need to finish what I could. My three year old son was anxious to help and we merrily rolled peanut butter cookies into balls to be baked as the next batch signalled it was done! His excitement was as real as mine! His blue eyes sparkled in the blinking Christmas tree. By noon we were ready as that was our deadline.

My husband arrived at the appointed hour.It was pre-arranged and several weeks early.Today our new baby would arrive in the chilly early Kansas evening.

This day a son was born to a little family. His arrival would forever change our lives.

Happy birthday, my son, Michael!You light up our lives!

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Ripples

Ripples

Wash from waving dunes to undulating

surf

Whispering” come follow”…

Tracing ancient, ageless paths

across the empty beach.

Under a silent silver sky,

I stoop to scoop a single shell,

The broken and the whole.

The wind and sand polish my cheeks soft.

70 years of living

Smoothed to satin, again

Baby-soft skin,

Reborn of the wind…

Following timeless ripples to the sea.

Nancilynn

November 2018

Port Aransas, TX

Memories

It’s strange how you can remember where you were who you were with and the smallest details of seminal events that color our history.

Twenty- five years ago today, I was standing in my kitchen covered up to my elbows in jerky marinade as I was attempting to make the treat homemade. Although labor intensive it seemed to be well within my skill set and I was anxious to use my new dehydrator.

When the phone rang, I picked it up as my husband was outdoors doing yard work. I heard in single words: accident, Emergency Room, air flight. Come now!

I called frantically to my husband to come NOW, at the same time ripping my marinade spattered blouse off replacing with a clean shirt.

It was a short ten mile drive to the hospital but a university football game traffic slowed the frantic drive.

Family filled the sidewalk in front of the hospital doors. Inside, my daughter in law sat, her face ashen.

Her mother came to meet us. The tragic story almost too sad to comprehend.

In time, an ER Nurse came to get the two grandmothers. We were led down a darkened narrow corridor to see our youngest grandchild. To say goodbye.

Nothing could have prepared us for the sight of our precious boy with a a row of angry metal staples holding his small head together. In the background, the woosh of life-support equipment. This.was not to save his life but his viable transplantable organs.

The transplant team, chaplains and nurses had taken me aside beforehand with the grim frankness of the prognosis. The request of me to convince his mother to let him go.

The day was one of the saddest of my life. Phone calls to great grandparents; a phone call to my son, his father, who was in prison. The rest of the day and following week unfolded in black and white like a silent movie.

I remember other events that marked time on my life but none like the death of baby Joshua, that burned grief indelibly ony heart.

© Nancilynn Saylor

September 25,2018

Another Blue Moon Night

I lie in bed gazing at the full moon staring back at me through a crescent window high on my bedroom wall. It has been the same for twenty seven years now…my personal time with the dark sky.

In twenty seven years, 324 full moons plus a few extra blue moons. Interesting, yet trivial knowledge from this moon child.

My mind drifts to those few I’ve shared this magic with-most all of them gone from this tiny speck of a planet in an insignificant universe.

“Come here,” I call out to the other room; Romeo comes to watch another moonrise with me.

©Nancilynn Saylor

31 January 2018

Celebrate!

January 7, 2018

The new year is scarcely a week old but already my family swells with the birth of my newest great-granddaughter this afternoon.                                                                                     I was asked several months ago to help with the finding of a great name for a girl as I felt all along this would be a girl.  My name choice was Rosalie Grace. Her mom decided on Brianna Grace, and as Grace is my family’s nickname for me, she is sort of named after me.

She arrived weighing 7lbs. and 13 ounces, 20 1/4 inches long. As you can see in the picture, she has a full head of black hair.                                                                          Welcome to the family, Brianna Grace!

 

© Nancilynn Saylor 7 January 2018.

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Behind blue eyes

Today we celebrate our son, Mike on the occasion of his 46th birthday.
He was not with us
for so many birthdays
Lost in a world where mom's and
Dads don't go
except in the nightmares
Of their minds when sleep curls up in
a cold corner of the dark room
And they can only stare silently at the
Ceiling, while the whirring fan seems
to mark the months on invisible
calendars.
We joyfully celebrate his love and his gentle spirit
Thankful for his presence across the dinner table
he is in arms reach and but
a heartbeat away.
Happy birthday, sweet child o' mine!

© Nancilynn Saylor
14 December 2017