January 7, 2018

The new year is scarcely a week old but already my family swells with the birth of my newest great-granddaughter this afternoon.                                                                                     I was asked several months ago to help with the finding of a great name for a girl as I felt all along this would be a girl.  My name choice was Rosalie Grace. Her mom decided on Brianna Grace, and as Grace is my family’s nickname for me, she is sort of named after me.

She arrived weighing 7lbs. and 13 ounces, 20 1/4 inches long. As you can see in the picture, she has a full head of black hair.                                                                          Welcome to the family, Brianna Grace!


© Nancilynn Saylor 7 January 2018.

Image may contain: 1 person, sitting, phone and indoor



Behind blue eyes

Today we celebrate our son, Mike on the occasion of his 46th birthday.
He was not with us
for so many birthdays
Lost in a world where mom's and
Dads don't go
except in the nightmares
Of their minds when sleep curls up in
a cold corner of the dark room
And they can only stare silently at the
Ceiling, while the whirring fan seems
to mark the months on invisible
We joyfully celebrate his love and his gentle spirit
Thankful for his presence across the dinner table
he is in arms reach and but
a heartbeat away.
Happy birthday, sweet child o' mine!

© Nancilynn Saylor
14 December 2017


Such a difficult decision to make; no easy choices and no right answers. An 8 pound  male puppy coming of age in a house with a three pound Chihuahua in heat

The alpha male in our home is Romeo. Tiny Chica is his emotional service puppy and the fight ran for months stretched from  weeks on end…

It became the.Elephant in the room-every room.

I begged  to have her spade. He would not hear of it- his poor little baby. I reminded him that Chachi would grow.                        He became Egyptian-and the waters of his  denial  ran deep. The friction of this dog fight shook the very walls of our little world.

This past week I scheduled the tiny, already now  pregnant  Chica for surgery. 

I also posted a request to re-home Chachi in our neighborhood web log. 

By the end of the day, on Friday,  both occurred. As Chica softly moaned on the sofa, a lovely  new angel rose up in our lives. “I never go to that group,” she said. She’d not had a dog in many years. The picture, below, she said, made her call.

Two  very sleepless nights, Romeo lamented. The missing pup infiltrated his dreams. Tears wracked his aging body.  Not to my credit, I seemed callous. It had all driven by him.                                                 His anxiety led me to contact the new momma owner to enquire about their bonding…was she as happy on Sunday as on Friday? I told her my alpha male had anxiety issues.

She just left our place, with Chachi, after spending over an hour here. He had been to Pet Smart and on several 30 minute runs. He has learned to sit on command. He was a calm pup truly enamored with his elevated status and his new mom.

Our lives were touched by this wild dog. He fed on the anxiety in our home . He is thriving in his new environment. He lives next door to a park. 

I loved him dearly. 

I loved him enough to let him go.

©Nancilynn Saylor 09 July 2017

Things about my son, Steve

The day he was born it was 113
He was born in Abilene Texas

He was a breach baby who was delivered by forceps before he could flip back to breach position

His hair was red.when he was born but turned blonde later

He was awake more than asleep as a baby

He wanted attention all of the time 

To get anything done I put a huge mirror beside his crib and a transistor radio in his crib

He preferred Rock music 🎶 

He had a great appetite 

He was so chubby he had trouble walking and my back hurt from carrying him

He started running as soon as he could walk

He weighed 30 pounds at his 6 months checkup 

He hated shots 

He would not eat mushrooms or onions

He had a wonderful laugh

He was very stubborn

His favorite toys as a child were guns 

He started smoking at age 14

He liked to be outdoors

His favorite birds were Cardinals

He had a knack of untangling things: necklaces, Christmas lights and 100foot extension cords

He loved to barbecue 

He loved swimming and jumping off rocks into lakes

(Or off rope swings into rivers!)

He was terrified of the swimming pool until age 6

It was hard for him to learn to tie his shoes

He had an imaginary friend when he was 3 & 1/2 -her name was Mercedes

He cried at the end of Bonnie and Clyde movie

His kindergarten teacher said he had ADHD

He had dysgraphia as a child and had therapy for a year

He had difficulty writing and spelled poorly

He scored very high on scholastic aptitude tests

He had difficulty following rules

He did not like authority

He said he learned best from his mistakes

He climbed into tree when he was 4 and hung himself with a rope he found there while playing cowboys

He had a short temper

He was an extrovert 

He loved his friends and family

He loved to read! Dune, Tolkien, and Harry Potter and always had book handy

His favorite movie was Dune

He always was a “people magnet”

He could make anyone laugh

He liked to cook

He had an AK 47 on the back of his kitchen door

He loved all animals and always had pets

He did not like hunting 

He loved to go fishing

He loved Drama in high school

He was not good in mathematics 

I tought him the multiplication tables when he struggled with new math

He had a great singing voice 

He was extremely patriotic 

He liked to smoke pot

He loved motorcycles

He liked to take a nap on my bed even as an adult

He liked dragons and unicorns

He loved red meat and beer

He said he was going to get “back- in- shape” when he turned 36-eat more salads and drink less beer

He was a loyal friend

He loved deeply

He was quite opinionated 

He was very sensitive

He loved Native American art

He liked heavy metal bands

(but also John Denver)

His room was usually very tidy

He loved watching clouds

His nickname in the army was Psycho

He wore his hair long most of his life 

He died from Sudden Cardiac Arrest at age 35

Today would have been his 49th birthday  

Happy birthday in Heaven, Steve!

©Nancilynn Saylor

  30 June 2017

You are always on my mind…

Waking up to another day.                    without you here,                                             on this the, thirteenth year.                                

I know you’d be smiling just                                  knowing it is going to be another hot       

sun-baked summer day-                            you’d be looking for someplace to swim &.                       something to put in the grill.                       

You are probably thinking how I can still have tears…                                                  

after so long.                                                      

I’ll likely always begin these remembrance days                                                                 

with a lump in my throat as                                  I blink back hot tears.                                    

The hug I feel around my shoulders      seems almost real today.                                                

I love you my dear firstborn son.                                       I always will. 

Keep watch over your brother and your friends                                                             who keep the spark of your memory alive.                                             

Death has not diminished our bond. 

©Nancilynnn Saylor                                        10 June 2017